Confusion, again
I look around me. What do I see?
Happiness? No.
Tolerance. A very high level of it. Who are these people? Where do they come from? I wonder. They're here for the easy money. Easy? It's not easy. They have sold their lives, their smiles, their true happiness for money. How can it be easy?
But one fine day they woke up and asked themselves a question - what is it that I want most in my life? Money, was the answer they got.
Qatar was the way to it. They came here.
I look around me. What do I see? I see sacrifice. Everywhere. Sacrifice for money.
I wonder, and I am sure, this wondering and thinking every day of my life in Qatar is only adding salt to my wound of hair falling off my head like nine pins... I wonder, if they can, why can't I?
Why the idea of me giving up maybe a year or two of my life for quite a huge sum of money isn't appealing to me?
I won't deny money has the power. It's certainly got me thinking. It's about just one more month. One more month and yet another lakh of rupees will be in your hand. Just like that. Then another month, and another, and another. Before you know it, years have gone by, your youth lost, the smiles vanished, and you're drowned in pieces of precious paper with your hands in the air trying to hold on to and catch some more of it falling from the sky.
When is it enough? When do you draw that line that OK, that's it. I don't want more. I got a life to live?
The months will come and go, money shall keep pouring in. At what cost? My 24th year of my life, maybe half of my 25th too. Or who knows? Like they say, Qatar grows on you, maybe my 26th and my 27th too.
Soon I'll realise I have become so accustomed to this laidback life that even if I want to I won't be able to work in the high-pressure, urgency-driven work environment of India.
Today, I am confused. Qatar's managed to do that - confuse me.
I am at a crossroad today. I gotta choose a path. Money or happiness.
Is there any such thing as now or never? Or should I wait another night, and wonder, if what I am doing is right or wrong, sensible or stupid?
Today, I am confused, again.
There's one thing but, I know for sure. I miss India.
I miss India.
posted by Once the Conman at 1:55 PM
10 Comments:
the real question is were u truly happy in india or are u just being the victim of the saying.... "the grass is always greener on the other side"?
Stop confusing me more. I am on the verge of taking a serious decision.
i truly believe that someone with your experiences & outlook on life cannot be confused... but if u truly are... ure not leavin much hope for the rest of us... maybe its not confusion. maybe its denial????
conman... have u ever met someone truly happy ever? i cant say that im TRULY happy with qatar but im happy none the less. it gives me the conveniences and relaxed lifestyle that i want. but then again i always want more. its only human to want more. sure workin in saudi sucks cause of the ristrictions. but if i was earnin double of what i was earnin here id probably think about it. ofcouse i woulndt go cause my lifestyle doesnt permit it. that doesnt mean i woulndt consider it.
man always puts himself in situations that he is in. and only he can either make a fuck of it or a paradise of it....
the air gets thinner in winter...
trust me...
so bad, huh?..u r not happy? why subject that to urself..nobody can force u to stay..just make that decision, but only when u r ready!!
First visit to your blog, and I think it made for a fantastic read.
As I keep saying.. in both our cases, it's just to do with having friends and company every evening to sit and have a drink or a smoke with.. you have friends, you like a place. Give it time. Sometimes I don't believe in it myself.. but I still hope.
In any case, you're talking about people who probably didn't have much of a life in India in any case.. and therefore don't miss much.
It's got nothing to do with what kind of a life you had in India (whether it was better or worse).. and everything to do with what kind of a time you're having now.
You're too young to be stuck in a country like Qatar. You should be in New York or Paris.. or Sydney.. Live yaar, Rohit.. you can't give up already. Abhi toh life shuroo hui hai.
Shukran Casablanca.
Cowlick: Just cribbing. Just...
The moon, the stars, the planets, the sun will have to come crashing down to soil for the day to come when I, Rohit Wadhwaney, must give up.
I'll fight. Forever.
Oh hell my reply didn't get posted...
Yeah, I said, why are we comparing Qatar with Saudi over and over. They're two different countries. If that's the case then lets just compare with Antarctica and say, hey look, we got a fucking life here at least. And lets be happy.
Sure, if you wanna look at things positively all the time, then yeah, compare Qatar with Saudi... and it'll be all cool.
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