Self destruction

You know how somehow you just know where you're headed... in the back of your mind or something like that.

I'm drowning. I'm going down. Yep... I'm drowning.

And the funny part is, I'm doing nothing to stay afloat.

Especially when I know how to swim.

How can I do this to myself?

Maybe I'm just trying to see how long I can hold my breath.

Or maybe, I'm just waiting to see when exactly my heart stops beating, and how it feels.

Or maybe, I'm just being the rebel I am - a rebel, without cause.

Maybe...