Angel
One day she asked me: “Ro... Write me a story.”
“How do you mean?”
“Write a story… for me.”
And then, I wrote… ‘Angel’
The beeping sound on my cell phone woke me up one night. I hated SMSs, detested them.
It’s so much easier to pick up the phone, dial and talk. Works out much cheaper as well considering you’d end up sending at least 10 messages each trying to say what you could in 10 seconds had you been talking instead of SMSing.
I grabbed my cell, cursing whoever would have sent me the SMS so late at night, and sleepily pushed the keys to read the message.
‘Hi there! Care 2 b my txtmate?’
Whatever, I thought to myself, and mumbled, ‘What a fucking jerk.’
I deleted the message right away, placed the phone on my bedside table, and tried to go back to sleep.
The phone beeped again.
‘Hi there, again! Care 2 b my txtmate?’ again, the message said.
Again, without bothering to reply I deleted the message.
Had it not been for my parents, who were always out of the country, I wouldn’t have owned a cell phone. They literally forced me to so that they could keep a check on me.
I wanted to turn the unit off, but since my mother was fond of calling me at night, just to check if I was safe at home, I decided not to.
Just as I was to close my eyes and return to my dreamless sleep, the phone beeped again.Same number...Such determination!
‘Pls reply 2 dis msg & b an angel & save me frm dis abyss of emptiness…’
I don’t know why, but the message struck me. I got up and pushed the keys... and realized I was replying to the message.
‘I’m not an angel, n if u want someone to save u, am not superman... I'm just a simple person who u woke up at this hour of the night!!! Anyway, do I know u?’ I typed.
Seconds later came the reply.
‘Nope. U don't know dis lonely soul. Nor does she know u. But I want 2 b ur frnd. I'm Noor Peris. U?"
‘Just call me William. How'd u get my number?’ I sent back.
‘Hi William, nice 2 meet u. Just shuffled the last two digits of mine…’ she replied.
That was the first, and maybe the last, time I met someone over the cell phone!
We exchanged messages after messages and learned so much about each other that night. Yet, there was so much more to know. We only said goodbye when my alarm clock burst out screaming at 5 am! I had to prepare for school!
And that was how it all started.
A day would not pass without loving and thoughtful messages from her. And it was only because of her messages that I became eager and excited every time my phone beeped, hoping it would be her.
Noor brought out something about me that I never knew I had; I realized I could also be a romantic... even if it's just through text messaging.
‘Keep me as a frnd & I will keep u in my heart. Lock it up & throw away d key so dat no1 can evr tke u away from me...’
One day, she sent this message to me.
I replied: 'In life, we seldom find a true person and if u ever find one, hold on and never let go... value that person coz it's life’s gift worth keeping and holdin on...’
I didn’t know why, but her response sent shivers down my spine, ‘Value d people hu hav touched ur life bcoz u will never know just wen dey will walk out of ur lyf & nvr come back again.’
I couldn't understand what I felt that moment, but one thing I was sure of though... I could not go on through with a day without a single word from her. I'd become used to having her, even though we had not met personally. But truly, she already occupied a space, a large one, in fact, in my life.
I texted her back. ‘Dont come close if later u’ll just pass by; dont touch me if later u’ll just let me cry; dont love me if later u’ll just leave me and wont stay...’
Somehow I felt, every word I wrote came from my heart. In the short span of time we were sending messages to each other, I knew, I was starting to keep her somewhere deep inside me. And it would be hard to pull her out of me.
Then one day, after a lot of thinking, I called her. The voice on the other end was like an angel's. Soft, kind, full of love. Yet, there was something in it I couldn't define. We only talked for a few minutes, before she hung up and told me never to call again.
'It would be better if we would just text each other,' she said.
But the voice kept ringing... in my head, in my heart. I'd long to hear it once more. I tried to call her again, but she never answered the phone. She just kept on sending messages and quotations, which I copied in a little notebook.
Hopeless romantic? I didn't know.
All I could say was that all the messages she sent were wonderful, they came from the heart and cut through the heart.
‘Though we r miles apart, u r always n my heart. I close my eyes & der u r. Even f I'll see u never, I'll always b hir 2 care 4 u, far longer dan 4ever...’
One December night, she sent me this message. By that time we had been exchanging messages for more than a month. God knew how happy I was. She was right. Although we had not seen each other, what we felt was enough to make us both realize what was keeping us together.
I replied back, ‘Loving u secretly is a hard thing for me to do, hoping, wondering that u will feel the same way too, but I can't read your mind if you love me too. But whatever it is, I'll still be loving you.’
‘How I wish I cud really tell u how much u mean 2 me, but m afraid 2 love, scared 2 get hurt... I hope dat u will wait 4 me & pray dat u will not get tired of loving me...=)’ came her reply.
And then I replied again. ‘The reason why I met you is coz of destiny but if destiny will suggest that I'll live without you, then I'll lie not by destiny but of free will.’
Whenever I asked her when we would meet personally, she always answered, ‘Soon...soon, love...soon.’
Not seeing each other did not lessen, even a bit, what I felt for her... rather, it even grew deeper and stronger each day. And I was sure, she felt the same way too.
Messages continued to flow through our lines, between our hearts, which made us go on each day with the thought that sooner, we would see each other, face to face.
Just a few days before Christmas. She stopped sending messages. At first, I just though she had ran out of prepaid.
But there was something that kept bothering me. I couldn't understand what was it, but it made me nervous. I tried to call her but she wouldn't answer. Nevertheless, I continued sending messages.
Suddenly one night, just three days before December 25th, I heard my phone's message tone again...
At last! It was from her!
‘Often tyms we say gudbye 2 d 1 we luv w/o wanting 2. Though dat doesn't mean dat we stopped loving dem or we stopped 2 care. Sometyms, GOODBYE is a painful way 2 say I LOVE YOU.’
I was dumfounded. I didn't know what to think of. What did she mean? I texted her back, searching for answers, but found nothing. I called her but she would not answer.
For the first time in my life, I felt so miserable...desperate... empty. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to lose her. I had learned to love her. It’s the only thing I knew. And I wanted to be with her, forever.
The following days I felt nothing but emptiness. It seemed that Noor took the life out of me. I missed her so much...her messages...The tones that would tell me she'd sent another loving message. Nothing around me could feel the emptiness I felt.
Just a day before Christmas, my cell beeped again.
‘Meet me at d café, 10 AM 2day,’ I read aloud, making sure the message was true, then I jumped with joy.
Hurriedly, I got myself ready and I went to the mall. I knew it was still early, but I wanted to be there before she arrived.
I arrived at the meeting place ten minutes earlier. I was surprised to see her already there, smiling at me. She was very beautiful. Black, deep-set eyes that spoke a thousand words; small, kissable lips; a nose perfectly chiseled and long brown-coloured hair with huge curls - everything about her was beautiful. And yes, her eyes radiated kindness and love...but there was a flicker of something in them...Sadness, I thought. It’s beautiful.
'Hi, William,' said the angelic voice I had been dreaming of each night. The voice that I had waited to hear for so long. 'Please sit down.'
'I am very pleased to meet you, Noor,' I said, as I took my seat and gave the white lilies I brought for her.
'Thanks, William,' she smiled, obviously pleased with the lilies. I knew she loved them.
'You are always welcome, Love.'
'William, I can't stay,' she said, sadness in her voice, or was it tears? 'I really must go.'
'But we just met, Noor. Can't we talk a little longer?' I asked, pleadingly.
'I can't really. I just came here to see you and thank you for the time you shared with me. Thank you for everything, William. I will never forget you...you will always be here in my heart.' She was looking at me straight into the eyes, and I could really feel the sadness in her voice and I swear, there was something in her voice and I swear, there was something in those lovely yet lonely eyes...
She got up and smiled at me. 'Tomorrow morning, please come and visit me,' she said and gave me a piece of white linen paper.
I read what was written - it was an address - and when I looked up, she was gone.
The following day, Christmas, I woke up early and excitedly readied myself, thinking of her. I went to the flower shop and bought loads of lilies for her.
They lived in an exclusive subdivision.
Upon reaching their house, I told the guard who I was and that I was looking for Noor.The guard stared at me, with amazed eyes, and told me to wait while he called the owner of the house. As I looked at him while he was going inside the house, I noticed that the house was brightly lit.
A woman came out and walked towards me, smiling… but sadly.
'Hi, I'm Maria, Noor’s mother. Please come inside, William,' she said.
While we were walking towards the mansion, she explained to me why she knew me very well – 'Noor had always been talking about her friend, William.'
I hardly understood what she was saying. I was busy thinking why Noor’s mother was crying while talking to me.
As we came near the great hall of the house, it dawned on me that there was a wake inside. Maybe, a relative passed away, I thought. But deep in my heart, I was trembling and afraid.
As we entered the hall where so many people were silently mourning while others were praying, shaking, I asked her mother. 'Where is Noor?'
She held my hand and silently, led me to the coffin, which was surrounded by flowers – white lilies, nothing but lilies.
No words could explain how I felt when I gazed at the coffin and saw who was lying there. The same beautiful girl I met... Noor.
A man came and stood beside me. I knew he would be Noor’s father.
'We are so glad you came, William. Noor talked of you all the time. She even asked that her phone be buried with her. She said that in that way, you could still send her messages and you would always be with her.'
I couldn't believe anything... My mind was in limbo.
'But how can this be? We just saw each other yesterday,' I mumbled, crying.
'That can't possibly be,' her father spoke. 'She passed away three days ago. She had been suffering from a heart disease since she was a child.'
'But...' the words didn't find a way out.
'She told us not to bother reaching you,' her mother said, still in tears. 'She said you will come, and here you are.'
I cried silently beside her, staring at her lovely face, memorizing every line of her face, a face I knew I would never forget.
After the internment that afternoon, I went to the chapel she had told me she went everyday.
Sitting there praying and crying to God, I held my phone and typed: ‘You taught me how to care… you taught me how to be kind… you showed me how to like someone… you showed me how to love. But there’s one thing you didnt teach me and it hurts more - you didnt teach me how to let go. I LOVE YOU...’
I sent the message, and though I knew she wouldn't be able to hold her cell phone again, I knew in my heart she would get my message.
Seconds later, my phone beeped.
The sender's number did not appear on the screen. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I read the message.
‘Let go of d hand of d person u love, but dont let go of God's hand. 4 if u hold 2 his hand. He may b holding d person u love n d ader hand 2 let u hold each other again.’
'I will never forget you, Noor... and I will never let go...' I vowed to her… and to myself as I left the church.
“How do you mean?”
“Write a story… for me.”
And then, I wrote… ‘Angel’
The beeping sound on my cell phone woke me up one night. I hated SMSs, detested them.
It’s so much easier to pick up the phone, dial and talk. Works out much cheaper as well considering you’d end up sending at least 10 messages each trying to say what you could in 10 seconds had you been talking instead of SMSing.
I grabbed my cell, cursing whoever would have sent me the SMS so late at night, and sleepily pushed the keys to read the message.
‘Hi there! Care 2 b my txtmate?’
Whatever, I thought to myself, and mumbled, ‘What a fucking jerk.’
I deleted the message right away, placed the phone on my bedside table, and tried to go back to sleep.
The phone beeped again.
‘Hi there, again! Care 2 b my txtmate?’ again, the message said.
Again, without bothering to reply I deleted the message.
Had it not been for my parents, who were always out of the country, I wouldn’t have owned a cell phone. They literally forced me to so that they could keep a check on me.
I wanted to turn the unit off, but since my mother was fond of calling me at night, just to check if I was safe at home, I decided not to.
Just as I was to close my eyes and return to my dreamless sleep, the phone beeped again.Same number...Such determination!
‘Pls reply 2 dis msg & b an angel & save me frm dis abyss of emptiness…’
I don’t know why, but the message struck me. I got up and pushed the keys... and realized I was replying to the message.
‘I’m not an angel, n if u want someone to save u, am not superman... I'm just a simple person who u woke up at this hour of the night!!! Anyway, do I know u?’ I typed.
Seconds later came the reply.
‘Nope. U don't know dis lonely soul. Nor does she know u. But I want 2 b ur frnd. I'm Noor Peris. U?"
‘Just call me William. How'd u get my number?’ I sent back.
‘Hi William, nice 2 meet u. Just shuffled the last two digits of mine…’ she replied.
That was the first, and maybe the last, time I met someone over the cell phone!
We exchanged messages after messages and learned so much about each other that night. Yet, there was so much more to know. We only said goodbye when my alarm clock burst out screaming at 5 am! I had to prepare for school!
And that was how it all started.
A day would not pass without loving and thoughtful messages from her. And it was only because of her messages that I became eager and excited every time my phone beeped, hoping it would be her.
Noor brought out something about me that I never knew I had; I realized I could also be a romantic... even if it's just through text messaging.
‘Keep me as a frnd & I will keep u in my heart. Lock it up & throw away d key so dat no1 can evr tke u away from me...’
One day, she sent this message to me.
I replied: 'In life, we seldom find a true person and if u ever find one, hold on and never let go... value that person coz it's life’s gift worth keeping and holdin on...’
I didn’t know why, but her response sent shivers down my spine, ‘Value d people hu hav touched ur life bcoz u will never know just wen dey will walk out of ur lyf & nvr come back again.’
I couldn't understand what I felt that moment, but one thing I was sure of though... I could not go on through with a day without a single word from her. I'd become used to having her, even though we had not met personally. But truly, she already occupied a space, a large one, in fact, in my life.
I texted her back. ‘Dont come close if later u’ll just pass by; dont touch me if later u’ll just let me cry; dont love me if later u’ll just leave me and wont stay...’
Somehow I felt, every word I wrote came from my heart. In the short span of time we were sending messages to each other, I knew, I was starting to keep her somewhere deep inside me. And it would be hard to pull her out of me.
Then one day, after a lot of thinking, I called her. The voice on the other end was like an angel's. Soft, kind, full of love. Yet, there was something in it I couldn't define. We only talked for a few minutes, before she hung up and told me never to call again.
'It would be better if we would just text each other,' she said.
But the voice kept ringing... in my head, in my heart. I'd long to hear it once more. I tried to call her again, but she never answered the phone. She just kept on sending messages and quotations, which I copied in a little notebook.
Hopeless romantic? I didn't know.
All I could say was that all the messages she sent were wonderful, they came from the heart and cut through the heart.
‘Though we r miles apart, u r always n my heart. I close my eyes & der u r. Even f I'll see u never, I'll always b hir 2 care 4 u, far longer dan 4ever...’
One December night, she sent me this message. By that time we had been exchanging messages for more than a month. God knew how happy I was. She was right. Although we had not seen each other, what we felt was enough to make us both realize what was keeping us together.
I replied back, ‘Loving u secretly is a hard thing for me to do, hoping, wondering that u will feel the same way too, but I can't read your mind if you love me too. But whatever it is, I'll still be loving you.’
‘How I wish I cud really tell u how much u mean 2 me, but m afraid 2 love, scared 2 get hurt... I hope dat u will wait 4 me & pray dat u will not get tired of loving me...=)’ came her reply.
And then I replied again. ‘The reason why I met you is coz of destiny but if destiny will suggest that I'll live without you, then I'll lie not by destiny but of free will.’
Whenever I asked her when we would meet personally, she always answered, ‘Soon...soon, love...soon.’
Not seeing each other did not lessen, even a bit, what I felt for her... rather, it even grew deeper and stronger each day. And I was sure, she felt the same way too.
Messages continued to flow through our lines, between our hearts, which made us go on each day with the thought that sooner, we would see each other, face to face.
Just a few days before Christmas. She stopped sending messages. At first, I just though she had ran out of prepaid.
But there was something that kept bothering me. I couldn't understand what was it, but it made me nervous. I tried to call her but she wouldn't answer. Nevertheless, I continued sending messages.
Suddenly one night, just three days before December 25th, I heard my phone's message tone again...
At last! It was from her!
‘Often tyms we say gudbye 2 d 1 we luv w/o wanting 2. Though dat doesn't mean dat we stopped loving dem or we stopped 2 care. Sometyms, GOODBYE is a painful way 2 say I LOVE YOU.’
I was dumfounded. I didn't know what to think of. What did she mean? I texted her back, searching for answers, but found nothing. I called her but she would not answer.
For the first time in my life, I felt so miserable...desperate... empty. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to lose her. I had learned to love her. It’s the only thing I knew. And I wanted to be with her, forever.
The following days I felt nothing but emptiness. It seemed that Noor took the life out of me. I missed her so much...her messages...The tones that would tell me she'd sent another loving message. Nothing around me could feel the emptiness I felt.
Just a day before Christmas, my cell beeped again.
‘Meet me at d café, 10 AM 2day,’ I read aloud, making sure the message was true, then I jumped with joy.
Hurriedly, I got myself ready and I went to the mall. I knew it was still early, but I wanted to be there before she arrived.
I arrived at the meeting place ten minutes earlier. I was surprised to see her already there, smiling at me. She was very beautiful. Black, deep-set eyes that spoke a thousand words; small, kissable lips; a nose perfectly chiseled and long brown-coloured hair with huge curls - everything about her was beautiful. And yes, her eyes radiated kindness and love...but there was a flicker of something in them...Sadness, I thought. It’s beautiful.
'Hi, William,' said the angelic voice I had been dreaming of each night. The voice that I had waited to hear for so long. 'Please sit down.'
'I am very pleased to meet you, Noor,' I said, as I took my seat and gave the white lilies I brought for her.
'Thanks, William,' she smiled, obviously pleased with the lilies. I knew she loved them.
'You are always welcome, Love.'
'William, I can't stay,' she said, sadness in her voice, or was it tears? 'I really must go.'
'But we just met, Noor. Can't we talk a little longer?' I asked, pleadingly.
'I can't really. I just came here to see you and thank you for the time you shared with me. Thank you for everything, William. I will never forget you...you will always be here in my heart.' She was looking at me straight into the eyes, and I could really feel the sadness in her voice and I swear, there was something in her voice and I swear, there was something in those lovely yet lonely eyes...
She got up and smiled at me. 'Tomorrow morning, please come and visit me,' she said and gave me a piece of white linen paper.
I read what was written - it was an address - and when I looked up, she was gone.
The following day, Christmas, I woke up early and excitedly readied myself, thinking of her. I went to the flower shop and bought loads of lilies for her.
They lived in an exclusive subdivision.
Upon reaching their house, I told the guard who I was and that I was looking for Noor.The guard stared at me, with amazed eyes, and told me to wait while he called the owner of the house. As I looked at him while he was going inside the house, I noticed that the house was brightly lit.
A woman came out and walked towards me, smiling… but sadly.
'Hi, I'm Maria, Noor’s mother. Please come inside, William,' she said.
While we were walking towards the mansion, she explained to me why she knew me very well – 'Noor had always been talking about her friend, William.'
I hardly understood what she was saying. I was busy thinking why Noor’s mother was crying while talking to me.
As we came near the great hall of the house, it dawned on me that there was a wake inside. Maybe, a relative passed away, I thought. But deep in my heart, I was trembling and afraid.
As we entered the hall where so many people were silently mourning while others were praying, shaking, I asked her mother. 'Where is Noor?'
She held my hand and silently, led me to the coffin, which was surrounded by flowers – white lilies, nothing but lilies.
No words could explain how I felt when I gazed at the coffin and saw who was lying there. The same beautiful girl I met... Noor.
A man came and stood beside me. I knew he would be Noor’s father.
'We are so glad you came, William. Noor talked of you all the time. She even asked that her phone be buried with her. She said that in that way, you could still send her messages and you would always be with her.'
I couldn't believe anything... My mind was in limbo.
'But how can this be? We just saw each other yesterday,' I mumbled, crying.
'That can't possibly be,' her father spoke. 'She passed away three days ago. She had been suffering from a heart disease since she was a child.'
'But...' the words didn't find a way out.
'She told us not to bother reaching you,' her mother said, still in tears. 'She said you will come, and here you are.'
I cried silently beside her, staring at her lovely face, memorizing every line of her face, a face I knew I would never forget.
After the internment that afternoon, I went to the chapel she had told me she went everyday.
Sitting there praying and crying to God, I held my phone and typed: ‘You taught me how to care… you taught me how to be kind… you showed me how to like someone… you showed me how to love. But there’s one thing you didnt teach me and it hurts more - you didnt teach me how to let go. I LOVE YOU...’
I sent the message, and though I knew she wouldn't be able to hold her cell phone again, I knew in my heart she would get my message.
Seconds later, my phone beeped.
The sender's number did not appear on the screen. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I read the message.
‘Let go of d hand of d person u love, but dont let go of God's hand. 4 if u hold 2 his hand. He may b holding d person u love n d ader hand 2 let u hold each other again.’
'I will never forget you, Noor... and I will never let go...' I vowed to her… and to myself as I left the church.
---
My statcounter this morning...
30 - 30.30% - India
16 - 16.16% - Singapore
16 - 16.16% - Qatar
11 - 11.11% - United States
6 - 6.06% - Australia
3 - 3.03% - United Kingdom
2 - 2.02% - Hong Kong
2 - 2.02% - Belgium
2 - 2.02% - Malaysia
2 - 2.02% - New Zealand
2 - 2.02% - South Africa
1 - 1.01% - United Arab Emirates
1 - 1.01% - Egypt
1 - 1.01% - Canada
1 - 1.01% - Unknown (???????)
1 - 1.01% - Israel
1 - 1.01% - Kuwait
1 - 1.01% - Finland
16 - 16.16% - Singapore
16 - 16.16% - Qatar
11 - 11.11% - United States
6 - 6.06% - Australia
3 - 3.03% - United Kingdom
2 - 2.02% - Hong Kong
2 - 2.02% - Belgium
2 - 2.02% - Malaysia
2 - 2.02% - New Zealand
2 - 2.02% - South Africa
1 - 1.01% - United Arab Emirates
1 - 1.01% - Egypt
1 - 1.01% - Canada
1 - 1.01% - Unknown (???????)
1 - 1.01% - Israel
1 - 1.01% - Kuwait
1 - 1.01% - Finland
---------
It's you Noor, isn't it? You're making 'Angel' come true... isn't it?
posted by Once the Conman at 12:18 PM
7 Comments:
i spent all of my yesterday at office reading 'Again'. Today at office too i did the same. Just now i finished 'angel'. why so much death in ur stories?
When my cousin died a few months ago everthing that happened consequently felt like he had a hand in it. Wierd things kept happening, some good, some bad, some funny... Logically it probably had nothing to do with him but I still choose to take the signs as messages from Salman. It makes me happy. To hell with logic! :)
That was good
Anon: I don't know if you know. But I detest you people ... I call you anonymous fools... but whatever... that's history.
Why so much death in my stories. Coz my stories are real. Each and everyone of them. Just like death.
Now because I know what a dumb fuck you are, you're gonna say, life is as real as death. Yes it is. So I show life... all the way... till the end.
How does life end... it ends with death.
Get it?
And just in case you ask... why are your stories always sad...
Reason: I love you, you love me... like crazy. One of us, WILL die before the other.
The end is always tragic.
Get it?
Next time: Find yourself an identity.
Xeb: It ain't an illusion I'm talkin about. Super-natural - that's the word. I don't expect you to get it.
Sangita: You're making it sound as if I was trying to perform.
And I probably won't. It's impossible inserting yourself in someone else's version of reality. But if supernatural you think it is then supernatural it must be. Smile, she's still with you. :)
I am smiling...
Life must go on...
Dude, tell me this. I've been following your love story with noor and i thought it was ad when you broke up. now is she really GONE? I'M really sorry man.
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